Front Seat Power Adjust problems of the 2004 Volvo S60

Driver's seat on 2004 Volvo S60r unexpectedly moves after unlocking car and opening the driver's door. Volvo says system is working as designed. They say that the seat must be moved to the desired position with the ignition turned on. If it is moved with the ignition off, it will return to the last position it was moved to with the ignition turned on every time the car is unlocked. There is almost a foot difference in height between my wife and me. She has opened the left rear door, placed items on the floor behind the driver's seat then opened the driver's door, which caused the driver's seat to move backwards to my position crushing the items on the floor. I have repeatedly opened the driver's door at night, had the seat move to her position without realizing it, stepped in and hit my head on the door opening. I'm being told I have to get into the car with the seat forward, turn on the ignition, then move the seat to the desired position to prevent the system malfunction I have described. Once you are sitting down the buttons on the side of the seat are hard to find, especially at night. This is a computerized nightmare that could be fixed with a software upgrade if Volvo were motivated to do so. The safe thing would be for the seat to stay where we left it.